Bye Bye, American Pie

When we look back on the events that have shaped our lives, we're no doubt left with indelible images accompanying them. As I typed 'events' in that first line, it was spoken in broad terms. An event could be anything: a movie, a song, a party, a tv show ... I think you get the point.

For me - and I'm thinking many others in our generation (those of us in our early to mid-twenties) - one of these events was the advent of the 'American Pie' series. What a perfect set of films to drop when you're in the last couple years of high school. Everyone wanted their experiences to mirror those of the gang. No matter how embarrassing those situations may have been, they let everyone in on what it was like to be a hard-partying, wannabe cool guy in what I believe are the true "formidable years."

You know you wanted your senior trip to be at a beach-front mansion, ya'll strived to throw the Hail Mary into a blanket full of co-eds.

I'm afraid those days are over, my friends. Well, maybe not for us, because we have these scenes etched in our minds and will not soon forget the smiles and laughs brought to the table. My concern lies with a younger generation of kids who are being raised on a new blend of 'American Pie' shenanigans. Gone are the days of Finch unleashing in the girls bathroom, today we have 'American Pie Presents Band Camp'. Forget the band geek revealing a scandalous occurrence at summer camp, now the kids get to see Eugene Levy and Stiffler's brother in "The Naked Mile". Even my least favorite part of the original films - Oz pining for Heather - is replaced with run-of-the-mill frat house debauchery in "Beta House".

Gross.

I've not seen any of the new breed, and I refuse to, but they have to suck. It'd be like claiming "The New Class" was better than the original "Saved by the Bell". But, as I said before, the younger generation is who suffers. I think of my niece and nephew, both nearing the end of their respective high school careers, and I find it ashame they weren't able to enjoy and emulate the original American Pie's the way my crew did just a number of years ago.

Sensationalism can't be ignored. It happens in every form of media, hell, it happens in every form of life. If something is popular, someone will drag an otherwise good name into the dirt.

Seriously though. I've never seen 'National Lampoon's Animal House'. You know why? Because aside from 'Van Wilder' and the 'Vacation' movies, National Lampoon throws out nothing but straight to DVD garbage year after year. 'Animal House' is probably the Godfather of some of my favorite comedies of all time, be it 'Old School' or the aforementioned 'Pie' movies, and I'll never see it due to the ever-present desire to make a buck.

I'm sure my niece and nephew will look back on the original 'Pies' and have the same sense of who cares and whatever that I feel for 'Animal House,' all I'm saying, is it sucks it has to be that way.

So blame it on the producers, blame it on the studios ... shit, blame it on Eugene Levy. Just don't blame it on the fans. After all, we were there from day one ... We remember the old days. And they were just as great as that beach front mansion.